Hello and Welcome to,
Gossip & Giggles with T!
Today’s post is a little different to most of my posts. I feel like this one is a lot more personal, but I think that in the long run, it could help someone and if that’s the case then I don’t mind getting a little personal!
As I previously mentioned in a post before I was getting to a point where I was feeling really glum and stuck in a bit of a rut. I wasn’t feeling creative and everything I was starting I just felt like I couldn’t finish for some reason. So I began writing a list of all the things that I felt were stopping me from being my creative, happy, bubbly self. That’s when I realised that there are so many things that I am doing that are holding me back from being completely content and happy in my life. And these things are big changes that one has to make in their life, and I can tell you it has been a struggle, but overall, I don’t think I have ever felt so happy, creative, and relaxed!
So I thought I’d share with you some of the changes that have begun to make in my life, and hopefully, these inspire you to make a change to better your happiness!
Become less fearful / Stop thinking the worst –
I have always been very aware of consequences and the result in poor choices, but I never stopped them from letting me have fun. I used to make poor choices, and deal with the punishment if and when it came around. However, recently I have become extremely fearful in everything I do. It reached the point where I would think of the worst possible outcome and I would pretty much scare myself into not doing it. And, I have noticed how impossibly hard it is to have fun when all you can think about is what might happen.
So instead of thinking of the worst, I’ve started to think of the best possible outcome in everything and I’ve finally started tackling all those fears on my list (which has been eventful and slightly horrifying, but also really great). And I always try and remind myself that the only thing that ever happens or that ruins whatever it is I am doing is my constant overthinking.
This for sure is going to be one of the hardest changes to make, but if you have the determination to do so, then I believe you can do it.
Be more open and vocal –
I’ve never really been a lover of speaking about my feelings or what’s going on in my life. To be honest, I think that may have come from spending years of listening to others and helping them and never really feeling like I can tell them what’s going on in my life because it never seemed like a good time. So I would just keep it all to myself and deal with my own problems. But because of this when people would ask how I am or ask what’s going on in my life, I would always feed them the same simple lines and it was never because I didn’t want to talk about how I am or what’s going on, but simply because I never knew how much to tell them, and I feel like once I start, I probably won’t stop.
This is one that I am still tackling, but what I have learned is that talking helps so much, whether that be to a family member, friend, or stranger. Being vocal about how you are feeling and just letting someone be there to help you with whatever it is going on helps relieve all that weight of the world you feel like you have on your shoulders.
I’ve also noticed how happy I have become with being open about my true feelings. I always felt so afraid to give my opinion and say what I think in social situations, that I just never did. Simple things like saying ‘no’ was the hardest thing ever for me because I never wanted to be rude. However I think the rudest this was me not being myself around those people, and now it feels so liberating just saying that word.
Stop stalling – Do what I want to do –
Now, when I say this I don’t mean it like ‘drop everything and do what you want’ but more in the case of don’t let the opinions of others determine your choices. I’ve always been a bit of a people pleaser, and if I thought that someone may not like what content I post or, what I say, then I simply wouldn’t post it or say anything. I don’t know why I was so afraid about what others thought, and it was only when I stopped thinking about what content people would want that all these blog posts came flooding out of me, and my creativity began flowing again. I understand that yes, you write content for your audiences, but I don’t want to be one of those people. I write because it’s what I like doing and I want to write about things that interest me. If people want to read it they can, and if not, they don’t have to, and the right audience will come from that.
I’ve learnt that you can’t please everyone and that’s totally OK, as long as each party are respectful of each other and their opinions.
Chill out –
I feel like I can never chill out. There is always something going on inside my head. So taking time to just chill out, and not be so serious does you a world of good. My favourite this to do at the moment is watching an episode of a show I’ve been watching in the bath! I’ll place my laptop on the sink or on a towel on the toilet seat and I’d relax in the bath. There are no distractions and it’s like all my thoughts just go away. Taking time for yourself is so important for your mind and your happiness. You’ll find the more you do it, the less stressful each situation becomes because you’ll be going into those problems with a clear head. I’ve heard yoga and meditation are also supposed to really help. I’ve been wanting to take up both for quite some time, so when I do I’ll let you know how helpful it really is!
Letting go –
This is one I have been telling all my friends to do for a while now, and I am finally taking my own advice. I struggle so much letting go of things that happen in the past, to the point where my mind becomes full of so much negativity and it’s not a nice head space to be in. So, I’ve started to let things go, and it is tough. Especially when somethings have left a lasting effect on you. But, it is so important not to hold on to all that negativity. There’s a big difference between forgetting about it and letting go of it. Letting go is all about disconnecting the emotions attached to those moments. You can’t move forward if you are still feeling hurt by something that has happened.
For a long time I had a lot of hatred for a group of friends who treated me wrong, but removing that hatred for them, and replacing it with nothing made me feel so free. Letting go of that strong feeling, brought out a happiness that was hiding away. It’s made my life so much more pleasant, and enjoyable, and I finally feel myself becoming that person I once was.
No one in this world is going through the exact same thing as one person, but we’re all going through something. The decision to share this with you is with the hope that someone may read it and inspire them to make a change to better their happiness!
That’s all for now!
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Until next time,
Dream Big and Never Stop Laughing -T xo